Finally, it's the end of October. *Whew!* Happy birthday to my brother Aaron, who made his grand entrance some 30-eh years ago, just as Dad was about to take me trick-or-treating. I ended up doing the candy hunt with the next door neighbors. The next morning, I had a brand spanking new baby brother.
I love you, Aar-Bear!
circa 1982
What a crazy-busy month full of wonderful moments. First stop, Chicago, where I had the pleasure of sharing an hour with one of my fave bloggers, the lovely Patrice, aka Afrobella. Ta-dahhhh!
Chicago - October 12, 2011
Back in August, Bella held a sweet giveaway on her blog, offering up her Asus netbook to one of her longtime readers and (gasp) she picked me. Since I was headed to Chicago anyway for the Society of Women Engineers (SWE) Conference, we agreed to meet in-person. On her recommendation, we visited the Chi Bakery, which is an unassuming little place in the middle of a quiet block... but aren't unassuming little places often the most fun? By the way, the lemon cupcakes and red velvet cookies melted into oblivion in my mouth. Very nice treats! We chatted for about an hour, and I must say -- Patrice is just as kind and professional IRL as she is in on her blog, and I respect and admire her approach toward developing her personal brand. Bella, thanks again for taking time out of your busy schedule to meet with me and for the wonderful gifts.
The weather was unseasonably warm that week in Chicago. No offense to all my NYC buddies, but the Chicago skyline is so impressive. My coworkers and I took a water taxi to the Sears Tower and took pics at the top:
Then my sweet hubs whisked me away for a long weekend in Charlotte, NC. We visited the Jerald Melberg Gallery to view the works of NC native artist Romare Bearden. You might remember seeing some of his art on the Cosby Show. They're selling his originals, including one for $1.8 million, you know, just in case you have a little art money to spare. His collages are bold and beautiful.
Last stop for the month of October -- Anaheim, CA, for the Society of Hispanic Professional Engineers (SHPE) Conference. Unfortunately, I didn't have much time for sightseeing in Anaheim, but the weather was beautiful and the people I met around town were friendly. I look forward to going back with Charles so we can take a drive down the coastline.
Went for a jog beneath the palm trees at sunrise...
I also experienced Lush for the first time at the Anaheim Gardenwalk outdoor mall. Based on some reviews I've seen around the net, I'm a bit skeptical on the hair products, but decided to pick up the Godiva shampoo bar and the Wiccy Magic Muscles massage bar for the hubster. It contains cinnamon and smells just right for the fall/winter season. And my husband really, really likes it.
She has a lot of painting and no-sew projects (YES! because I do not know how to sew... yet).
Why carve, taking the risk of bleeding on the pumpkin, when you could simply paint the pumpkin? And in an ikat or Missoni print, maybe you can bring it inside and enjoy it through Thanksgiving. Check out her blog for more cool ideas.
I'm so excited about my first Natural Beauty interview. What better way to start than with my sister, Amy!
In Wrightsville Beach, NC
September 2011
What lessons did you learn about hair and beauty when you were a child? Growing up I remember wanting what I didn't have; the straight flowy hair like my barbies and the girls at my predominately white school/neighborhood had. I would constantly ask my mom, to the point where I think I exasperated her, to tell me what color skin I had and expecting, wanting…maybe even pressuring her to tell me "golden brown"…not black and not just brown it had to be golden brown…and why I couldn't have hair like theirs.There are pictures of me with really long hair when I was 5/6 years old, and that was my natural hair pressed. What's funny is that I don't remember having that long hair at that age but I do remember when it all got cut off because I was devastated! Mom eventually took me to get a perm so that it was easier for her to take care of, and I believe that is what broke my hair off from being really long to really short...I felt robbed. I felt very ugly growing up.
August 2009
How has your perspective about hair and beauty changed over time?
My perspective has done a complete 180 ever since I quit relaxing my hair in 2009. For years I did the weaves and extensions and spent (I say spent...I feel more like I wasted) time and money in the salon and it got to the point in 2009 that I finally got sick of I was just done. How many more times was I going to make an appointment, show up only to have to sit and wait an hour or two or three until the hairstylist was finally ready to see me, and then spend another 3 or 4 hours getting my hair done while she was also trying to finish up or squeeze in clients in between! Then she’d bump the ends of my hair even though I said I didn't want them bumped but she'd insist on doing it anyways and I'd just go along with it because at that point I was just ready to get out of there. So I'd get home or in my car away from the salon and be fixing it a way that I really wanted and here I just spent all this money and time! Then I'd worry about sweating out my perm or messing up my hair…so for me, just about every salon visit was a very unsatisfying, uncomfortable experience all around. Ultimately, I was sick of spending so much time getting my hair done. I realized I wanted to be doing other things with my time.
You introduced me to Curly Nikki and BGLH shortly after I decided to quit relaxing and that's when my perspective on beauty started to change. That was the first time I saw African-American beauty being celebrated and honored and I was like a sponge soaking it all in...all the pictures, styles, tutorials, products and clothes (OMG the clothes, the style!). It was overwhelming yes, but I welcomed it all.
I see so much more beauty in our culture and myself now than I ever have before and I am incredibly thankful for this change in perspective. It has really helped me to grow as a person.
When and how did you decide to go natural?
When I decided to quit relaxing, I didn't have a plan and I wasn't ready to embrace my natural texture yet, so up until the time I decided I was going to loc my hair I just maintained it on my own. I would wash it, condition it, use my flat iron and I bought some clip in extensions from Sally's or wore clip in extensions I made myself using left over hair I had purchased before for weaves so I could still get that length I liked. Then I started wearing wigs...the cheap ones at that. At some point I remember discussing my options with you in regards with what to do with my hair and you suggested I consider getting locs because it would fit my lifestyle and personality and that resonated with me. So I started researching locs on nappturality and the net…it took me a while to decide when and how I was going to get them. I got my locs installed in April 2010 via two strand twist extensions (human hair) because at that time, I only had about an inch or two of natural hair and I didn’t want to do the big chop, but I also knew without a doubt I wanted to loc so extensions seemed like a good idea. But they only lasted about 2 months; I think a week after I had them installed two of them had already slipped out and from there more went along with them so I ditched the extensions and went from there.
What three hair products/tools are must-haves for you?
clarifying shampoo
bobby pins - my saving grace for styling
some type of moisturizer - I'm experiencing with leave in conditioners (Oyin's juices, Jane Carter leave in, Oyin shine and define/whipped pudding, Taliah Waajid leave in, hot oil treatments (I don't rinse them out)
Where do you go for natural hair inspiration or advice?
Nappturality's loc forum
You Tube: bronzegoddess01, chescalocs, eloiseTV, barbaydian261, tbey82, qochemist, quotidianlight to name a few. I also like blogs: irocklocs, chescalocs, lecoil, lockrocker, queennaturalbeauty, naturallybeautifulhair, naturaleza, thenaturalhaven, flygirls, curlynikki, bglh, dreadenvy, locluvand then there's Loc'd life magazine...
I’m a junkie when it comes to researching natural hair online. I love it.
September 2011
What are the best aspects of being natural? The most challenging aspects?
To me, the best aspect of being natural is the freedom from what society deems is beautifuland what you have to do to look beautiful. You don't have to look European, you don't have to spend gobs of money on services and products to achieve awesome hair and if anyone tries to tell you otherwise you (now) know they are dead wrong! That is so liberating to me. Another positive aspect of being natural is that I’ve become more comfortable in experimenting with fashion, and it’s created another avenue for creativity when it comes to styling my hair on my own, since I don’t go to the salon, and these are things that I didn't realize would come along with the journey. I'm so inspired by the different hair and fashion styles that we put together as everyday women...it's bliss!
The most challenging aspects would be learning about your hair, but I think it's challenging in a fun way with moments of frustration…but to me such is life, there are ups and downs. It does take time to learn about it, to learn to listen to what your hair is telling you rather than hanging on to old methods of taking care of your hair. You have to learn what products work, what techniques work and if you’re going about it on your own then you know…there’s a huge learning curve. And There is definitely a mental transition as well.
What's the best compliment you ever received regarding your natural hair/beauty?
That it fits me, it's thick, and I have nice cheekbones.
In closing, please share anything on your mind regarding natural hair.
Research! If you’re interested in going natural, there is so much info available to you on the internet it’s ridiculous! At the same time, there IS so much info it can get overwhelming trying to filter through all of the information (and misinformation) and apply it to you and your hair. Understand it’s a process and be patient with yourself and with it. And have fun with it! Yes hair can make a big statement and it can directly affect your confidence, but inner confidence will shine no matter how bad of a hair day you’re having.
And yes you can have locs and work in the corporate world. I work for a major defense contractor…’nuff said.
Amy, thank you so much for sharing your story and being my first interview. I love you, sissypoo, and you are gorgeous!
